Afflictions of memories
by Kang-tian
Summary: when the time keeps ticking and you can't stop the heart beat from going faster just remember the past and the time will go faster
1. Default Chapter

This is just a story I decided to write.  Please review and tell me what you think.  I'll keep writing if it's worth it.  I just liked this idea.  

Disclaimer.  I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters but I do own the plot and the original characters.  I also own the song that is in here.  So don't sue.

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He paced.  For the first time in a very long time he was nervous.  He paced the room anxiously.  The other's eyes all on him, smiling and holding back giggles but they too were worries.  Too much time had passed and it was late.  No sounds could be heard as they waited.

He looked up at the clock.  Ten-thirty pm.  He finally sat down putting his head in his hands.  He needed to take his mind of all this.  He'd go crazy if he didn't.

He thought back at how it all started.  Yes this would keep his mind off the situation at hand.

###

"You look fine Draco."  Ben had told him.  He'd just stared at his reflection in the mirror once more before heading for the door.

This was a usual thing.  They were at a wizard's nightclub.  One of the newest, 'the red dragon.'

He'd met Ben a year ago when he'd started working.  After Voldemor had been defeated Lucius had lost his mind.  Draco suspected it might have been the dark lords way of leaving his mark.  After falling into a coma Draco's father had awakened unable to remember anything.  A blessing from the gods he supposed.

Now his father seemed a lot calmer.  He could only remember a few things.  About his wife who took care of him, his son who he treasured most.  Draco wished that his father could have gone through this year's ago before everything happened but better now than never.

Draco was now twenty-two and he was at the club.  It was a ritual.  He hadn't seen anyone from Hogwarts since he'd left and he liked it that way.  He'd never had real friends there.  He'd never had them because he'd never allowed himself to have them.

Now though he needed them.  He wanted and desired friends.  Not just people who would use him.  Ben was one of these people.  

"Yeah.  I guess so.  Come on lets go."  He said quietly leaving the bathroom.  Ben smirked playfully and followed his friend.  Ben had gone to an American wizarding school and had moved to London when he turned eighteen.

Heading out from the corridors Draco spotted her.  It was her legs that caught his attention since he was looking down but as he traveled up her body he couldn't help but gulp.  She was gorgeous.  

Her legs were a light tanned color and where long and slender.  She was clad in a light pink dress that hung from her well-curved hips and waist.  It was a spaghetti strap and he looked further up her body till he reached her face.

Her lips were luscious.  Full and pouty just the way he liked.  Her cheeks had a very light application of blush and her button nose accented her face perfectly. 

He looked at her eyes.  A soft shade of eye shadow covered her eyelids that covered those brown orbs, deep and meaningful, so full of knowledge and wonder.

Her hair was wavy and smooth.  He couldn't believe it.  He would recognize this girl even if fifty years would pass.  The girl he'd tormented for seven years in Hogwarts was standing right in front of him.  The woman that had haunted his mind for the last ten years. The girl he'd had a secret crush on.  The girl he thought he could never have.

Hermione Granger.

"Draco what you looking at?"  Ben asked oblivious to what was going on.  He looked up and saw her.  He gave a whistle and grinned.  "Nice catch."  

Ben was only joking.  Draco hadn't had a girlfriend or any female friend since he'd known him.  He kept to himself and it bothered him sometimes.  Draco really needed a girlfriend.

"Uh yeah."  He managed to mutter.  She stood there with her arms across her chest.  Looking quite out of place indeed.

He stared at her for along while before a group of women came to her side.  He recognized Ginny because of her long red hair but he only knew the other girls must belong to Gryfinndor maybe Ravenclaw and Huffelpuff.  

"Hey D-R-A-C-O?"  Ben sang out waving his hand in front of his friend.  A group of men came up to them looking quite curious.

"What's wrong with Draco?"  A guy with brown eyes asked.  "He looks dazed."

"Look at the brunette in the pink dress."  Ben said pointing to Hermione.  "He hasn't stopped looking at her since he laid eyes on her."

The group of males all turned to look at Hermione and all gave a low whistle of approval.  

They all started poking Draco to go talk to the girl.  It was about time he took interest in a woman.

"Come on Draco We were starting to think you played for the other side of the Quidditch team."  

He found himself in front of the group of women looking straight at Hermione's beautiful eyes.

"Yes?"  She said slowly as if she recognized him but couldn't place from where.

"Hermione?"  He said slowly.  She nodded ignoring the giggles from her friends.  

"Yes that's me.  Who are you?"

"I'm Draco."  He said confidently.  She would not make him nervous, she would not make him nervous.

"Draco Malfoy?"  She said in shock.  This couldn't be right.  This was not Draco Malfoy.

"Yes.  Draco Malfoy."  He said expecting her to slap him now that she knew who he was.  

"Oh Merlin."  She whispered.  "It can't be."  

Before she could say anything else the girls around her started talking to Draco as if they were all good friends.  They made him sit down with them and they all started talking about what they'd been doing.  

Draco's friends watched from a distance laughing at the young dragon's dilemma.  

They finally decided to walk over to him and see if they could help.

"Ladies excuse the interruption but I think you have something that belongs to us."  Ben said grinning widely at Lavender who smiled flirtatiously back.

"Oh really.  What could we possibly have of yours?"  Another girl asked.

"Well it's about 6'4, has piercing blue eyes and platinum blond hair and is glaring at me right now."

"Oh you're Draco's friends?"  Ginny asked smiling.

"Yes."  They said at the same time.  In total there were about seven women including the silent Hermione.   

"Well then please join us."  Lavender said.  "We're celebrating Ginny's engagement."  

"Oh congratulations Miss Ginny.'  David said smiling.  He extended his hand and shook hers firmly.

"Thank you."  She said 

Draco was pushed to sit next to Hermione while everyone got comfortable on the plush couches.

"So how did you get in here?"  Parveti asked the boys.

"Oh Allan here owns it."  David said patting a blond man sitting next to him.  They all went into a long conversation about the club and how it started and most of the women were enthralled.

Hermione wasn't' interested so instead she started speaking to Draco.  "I can't believe you'd remember me."

"Well it's very hard to forget you."  He said leaning closer to her so they could speak.

Hermione's cheeks became a light shade of red and she quickly changed the subject.  

"How's your father?"  She blurted out

"Oh my father.  Well he and my mother are on holiday at the moment.  He's fine though.  Coma did him good."  He said weakly.  It was still very hard to talk about it.  He'd been the one to find his father in his crazed condition.

###

"Father?"  Draco called out.  He'd been looking for him for about an hour.  He would have left him out there but his mother had been so insistent.  

He was about two miles from the manor.  They'd heard that Voldemort had finally been defeated and most of the death eaters were running around like an army of lost ants.

He was near one of the many rivers and he lit his wand closely to the water.  He saw a body.  He let his eyes adjust to the darkness and he walked closer to it.  His eyes widened in horror.

"Dad."  He ran towards his father who was breathing very shallowly.  

"Draco."  He said in a tone he'd never heard his father use.  

"Yes father it's me."  

His eyes were dull as Draco lifted him.  Draco shifted his weight so he could carry the older man. 

"Should be a nice party."  Lucius said gleefully.  "Everyone's going to be there.  Make sure your mother looks beautiful."

"She always does father."  He said going along with his father's babble.  He needed to get him to a hospital but where.  It was too dark to see.  He shifted once again and pointed his wand up to the sky.  He'd need help.

"Course she does.  Beautiful woman your mother, should have seen her when I was your age boy.  Was a rare gem indeed."  After that Lucius went on to tell Draco things he'd never heard of.  About how they'd celebrated their marriage and how Narcissa had fallen pregnant. "You my boy are our prize.  Make sure you make us all proud won't you."

That was the last thing he said.  He fell unconscious and only then did Draco realize that his father had been bleeding.  He placed him down on the soft ground and started to let up red lights in the sky He saw someone respond and he only prayed they got there in time.

"Come on you old fool wake up, you can't leave us now."  Draco said bending down next to Lucius.

"Who's out there?"  Auroras.

"Over here."  Draco called out.  Four men came by.  "He's bleeding."

"Don't worry we'll make sure he's ok."  One of the older men said.  They lifted Lucius up and levitated him towards the nearest lights.  "He'll be alright son."

###

They all started to order drinks.  Draco watched Hermione all night. The way she lifted her cup.  The way she played with the rim of the glass as she drank from it.  Her eyes would glance up every so often and stare at him but being the type of man he was he didn't look away.

His eyes held a challenging streak in them.  He challenged her to turn away from him.  He'd changed a bit.  His attitude towards people had soothed but he was still Draco Malfoy.  No one could take that away.  It was in his blood.

Hermione stared at him for a long while.  Neither spoke as the others talked about anything.  It didn't go unnoticed though that the Slytherin and the Gryfinndor seemed extremely quiet.

"Oh look Harry's here."  Ginny said happily.  She stood up and greeted her fiancée.  He grinned and waved at the group.  Ginny didn't let him go to the table though.  He was reluctantly dragged onto the dance floor.

"You know Ginny's got a good idea there.  Draco take Hermione out on the dance floor and I'll take this lovely flower out."  Ben said getting up and taking Lavender's hand.  "I hope your husband doesn't' mind."

"I don't have one.  Or a boyfriend."  She said quickly.  "Go on Hermione go dance."

"Oh no I couldn't."  Hermione said quickly.  Draco on the other hand did not back down from his friend.

"No I'd be happy to."  He said firmly and grabbed her hand.  She got up with a huff and walked to the dance floor.  

"You know maybe I didn't want to dance."  She said hotly.

"Maybe I did."  He retorted as he started dancing with her.

_Taking in all that you see._

_Want to be anywhere but here._

_Want to say goodbye to everything, I don't know why._

_I don't know why._

They danced to the music and he placed his hands on her hips.  So enthralled by the music she took no notice only kept dancing.  Singing to the witch's voice.  

_You walk around this crazy place._

_Where things are never quite the same._

_You want to escape this world and join your own._

_Want to be with me and know what's real._

The music started getting a little faster and the red dragons that were on the ceiling flew around in a raging battle that imitated the dancers.

_Leave the light on for me._

_I don't know when I'm coming home._

_I just have to be free._

_Let the magic spin your world._

_Let the world be the magic in your soul._

The dance music started after that and Hermione danced happily with Draco.  He smiled at the feel of her in his arms and felt her completely relaxed at his touch.

"I've missed you."  He said over the music.

"What?"  She strained to hear him over the loud drums.

"I said I've missed you."  

"Oh.  That's nice."  She said not hearing him clearly.  He sighed and looked up at the glass chamber where no one was dancing in.

"Come on."  He said slyly.  She looked up and saw the chamber.  

"No Draco I don't want to."  She said quickly.

"Do you even know what it is Granger?"  He said in his old tone.

"How do you now I'm still Granger?"  She retorted.  The comment stung his heart.  Oh Merlin what if she wasn't.  He looked down at her hand quickly and noticed no ring.

"You're not married."  He said quickly.  "No boyfriend either I'm guessing."  He said looking around the room.

"No, no boyfriend either."  She agreed looking down. He grinned while she wasn't looking and pulled her into the empty camber.  

The light started flashing around them as the music changed into a faster beat.  He looked at her and started explaining.

"It's a music chamber.  You follow the steps on the floor.  Try not to get it wrong too many times.  I just bought this outfit."

"What?"  She asked.

"Just do it Granger."  He said quickly forcing her to dance. Outside the chamber their friends started to watch.

"Oh god."  Hermione moaned as she started following the steps on the floor.  It had been a new novelty for the club.  Dancing chambers were you followed the music.  If you got it wrong…

"Paint."  She squealed.  Little flakes of paint started snowing down on them in different colors, along with different fairy dusts and muggle sparkles. 

"Come on.  Keep up."  Draco ordered laughing at the situation.  Everyone started watching as they danced to the beat.

_I'm totally lost._

_There's nothing to say._

_Don't you dare walk away_

_You'll just have to stay._

_Live with me._

_Breath with me._

Everyone started dancing again as the lyrics started up again.  Draco took Hermione out of the chamber and they sat back down.  

"Oh god who made that thing?"  She said laughing at her state.

"I did."  He said proudly.  "Allan wanted some help so we all pitched in."

"I honestly never see you helping someone Draco Malfoy."  She said grabbing a mirror from her purse.

'Well I've changed a lot."  He said huskily.  "Listen do you want to get something to drink.  There's a café just a block away.  I really want to talk to you without the music."

Hermione stayed quiet for a long time.  He was worried now.  Nervous even, he'd admit it now.  Would she reject him and tell him to get lost.  The glint in her eyes said something though.  He could only hope.

'Sure."  She said grinning.  Grabbing a note and small quill she wrote a note to her friends and got up grabbing her jacket.  

They walked out together not noticing the group all watch them leave.

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Well I hope you liked it. I'll keep going with it.  I was trying to write a one shot but failed miserably.  I've aid it I can't write one shots.  I'm not that type of writer.  I'm a chapter writer.  

Well anyway.  Enjoy.  

Kang/Sanura.


	2. denial

The clock on the wall kept ticking as he waited. He was alone now. Everyone had left to get food. He sat there unable to keep calm. Why wasn't he in there? Why wasn't he there?

They'd told him no, he wasn't' allowed, it was plain stupidity. Old fashioned and stupid but he complied, if only for the sake of keeping calm.

He closed his eyes and sat against the wall. He'd have to think of something to keep his mind off this torture.

###

They sat in the wizard café in silence. Hermione had some exotic wizard coffee and Draco had a simple butter beer. He'd ordered a few cakes as a side treat.

They hadn't spoken when they'd left the club. They hadn't spoken when they reached the café and ordered they just stared at each other. Draco couldn't think of anything to say.

'What would you say?' His mind sneered. 'Jeez I'm sorry that I called you all those things in school. Would you go out with me this weekend?'

"So." She said breaking the silence.

"So." He repeated She gave a short laugh.

"I'm sorry. I really never expected to ever see you again. To be quite honest when we left school my greatest wish was to never lay eyes on you again."

He winced a little at the comment but put on his usual Malfoy front.

"Well sorry to break your wish."

"No it's alright. In all honesty I'd replayed our meeting a thousand times over. I always thought the first thing I'd do would be slap you. This has been a very interesting change."

"I can imagine." He got a little closer. "So tell me. What have you been up to Hermione granger?"

She started telling him about working for the ministry. She was working in the newest section of the ministry, the environmental and health section.

"You know how a lot of wizards and witches want to be able to talk to people who have their similar backgrounds, well I help clean the environment and I do research on the health factors. She finished softly. "What about you?"

"Been working in one of the wizarding businesses. The international trades and affairs." He said simply crossing his arms over his chest as he drank his butter beer. "Nothing much apart from that."

"You're married to your job." She said with a laugh. He raised an eyebrow. 'If you only knew.'

"Yeah. You could say that." He looked into her deep brown eyes. "But by the looks of it so are you.'

"I'll admit it yes." She said leaning against the table. Her hair tousled a little from the movement.

His eyes held a bit of mischief as he smirked. "Late hours."

"No social life."

"No holidays."

"No parties."

"No significant others."

"No dates."

"Go out with me." He said all of a sudden. She opened her eyes wide and leaned back looking quite shocked.

"What?"

'No point turning back now Malfoy.' His mind taunted. 'You blurted it out. No finish it.'

He took a deep breath and repeated himself. "Go out with me."

"I…I don't' know what to say. Draco you hate me."

"Would I have asked you here if I hated you?" He said sincerely. "Hermione, please go out with me. Nothing intimate just dinner."

"Why?" She asked. Her eyes held a little shock but mostly doubt. Would he stand her up just to humiliate her? "You haven't seen me in so long and you've seen me maybe three hours at the most and you want to go out with me?"

"Yes." He said bluntly. He was starting to get annoyed. Why couldn't she just say no already and break his heart?

"Are you trying to make a fool of me Draco?" Oh how he loved the way she said his name. The way it just rolled off her tongue.

"No." He said softly. "I'm over that. Look I know you hate me. I don't deserve anything from you. I treated you like crap over the last seven years and I never apologized for any of it. I'm going to do it now Hermione. I'm sorry I said you were nothing, I'm sorry I called you a mudblood and I'm so sorry I acted like I hated you."

"I don't hate you Draco." She said just as softly. "You hurt me and I tried so hard to hate you but I just kept hurting. I hated it when you teased me or called me a mudblood but I could never truly hate you. None of us could. When I heard about your father I felt bad. I heard that you were the one to find him and I honestly would never wish that upon anyone."

"So you feel sorry for me?" He sneered. 'Great the girl I love pity's me.'

"No Draco. I don't feel sorry for you. It's just I never thought you'd want to go out with me." Draco stared at her for a long time and realized that maybe her self-esteem wasn't' as wonderful as she made it out to be.

"Just one date." He said. "No strings attached, just one dinner and that's it." Anything would be better than rejection. He really couldn't handle rejection and if she did his heart would seriously need to be replaced.

"I, Draco I haven't been on a date since we left Hogwarts." She said. Was she making excuses or was she truly afraid of him?

"I know." He remembered how Ron had broken up with her. Telling her that he wouldn't be second to anyone. They remained friends but not as close.

She stayed silent for a long moment. Probably trying to think logically about what she would do. She hadn't been on a date for a long time and well here was Draco Malfoy offering one to her. This man had taunted her for seven years. He'd disgraced her and humiliated her on many occasions but he was also the torment of her dreams.

'One night to fulfill your hearts deepest desire, a night with Draco Malfoy.' Her mind whispered. She sighed and looked into Draco's steel blue eyes.

"Alright." She finally said.

Draco looked nothing less than stunned. His eyes widened and he gripped the table. She'd said yes. She had accepted his request of a date with him. His mind was baffled, logic didn't seem to be placed in her answer but who cared. She said yes.

With a triumphant grin he nodded and took another sip of his drink. "I'll need your number."

"Yes. What day are you planning on us going out?" She asked as calmly as possible.

"Next Saturday." He said smugly. "I'll pick you up at six."

"Take that smug look off your face Malfoy. I can always change my mind." She warned. He loosened the smirk a little but didn't loose it. He looked as innocent as possible.

He breathed in softly and looked at his reflection. He was standing in front of his bathroom mirror. He'd bought the apartment six months ago when his parents kept going on holidays. He'd suggested it to them. To make up for lost time, so when that started happening the manor felt a lot colder than it really was so he'd bought his own place.

After dropping Hermione at her house he'd come back to the apartment only to be bombarded with telephone calls from his friends who had seen him leave with Hermione.

'Worse than women they are.' He thought as he finished buttoning up his shirt.

They'd come over and started asking questions and he'd answered truthfully. They'd almost burst and thrown a party with what he'd told them and he wouldn't lie when he said he was happy.

She said yes, that's all his mind could think about. The most beautiful woman in existence said yes to me after years of torment.

He looked at the clock on his wall. '5:25' it read. He finished getting ready and started for the door. For someone who had been so against muggles he owned a lot of muggle things.

Grabbing his car keys he walked down to the elevator. It took him a good twenty minutes to get to her house. She lived in a small two-story townhouse just outside Hogsmeade with Lavender and another room mate.

He arrived just on time and grabbed the flowers he'd brought her. Walking up the neatly bricked path he noticed the way the front garden was laid out. There were rose bushes towards the back with brilliant red's and pinks and a few whites here and there.

Towards the front were rainbows of colors. Different flowers and herbs he suspected Hermione and the others used for spells.

He now stood at the wooden door and he rang the doorbell. It took a good two minutes for someone to answer and he heard the running of a woman on heals.

"Draco. Nice to see you, she'll be down in a minute." Lavender said out of breath. He nodded and followed her into the living area. It had very comfortable looking couches and it looked very cozy. The fireplace was full of pictures of family and friends, even old pets. He had once envied all this. Now though his mansion was starting to have some of those things. Slowly he was recovering the family he'd lost.

Lavender went back upstairs and he heard a lot of murmuring and excitement. Hermione had really not been on a date for that long.

He stood up when he heard footsteps coming down the stares. He grinned broadly when she came down. She wore a beautiful green dress with a matching shawl. Her hair was placed in a loose bun leaving some strands hanging down to accent her face. Her face was gently painted in makeup, just enough to highlight her features. Her eyes were shadowed with dark mascara and it made her look mysterious and wild. He definitely liked that look

No words were said between them as she came down the stairs. Only when she was standing in front of him did he say anything.

"You look beautiful." He whispered. Lavender stood at the doorway of their kitchen watching with their roommate Cassandra, a witch who worked in Hogsmeade.

"Thank you." She said with a blush. "I hope it isn't' too formal. I honestly didn't know what to wear."

"Granger you're babbling." He said with a smirk. He placed a finger on her lips and said. "You look perfect."

"Have a good time." Cassandra called out with a giggle. Hermione blushed as they left.

"I didn't think you owned a muggle car." Hermione commented as they got into his Volvo. (It's my favorite car so it's going to be Draco's as well.)

"Well with the work I do I was forced to buy one. Wasn't working apparating everywhere. Some wizard buildings are in the muggle world. Almost got caught a few times. It's just easier to come out of a tunnel that appear on a street."

"Oh, so where are we going?" She asked as she put her seatbelt on. He just smirked and started the car.

"You'll see." He said putting on his sunglasses.

He apparated the car to one of the tunnels in London and they drove on ignoring the look of shocked little children

They finally reached a fancy looking restaurant in the heart of London. Draco took Hermione's hand when he parked the car and he led her into the beautiful hallway.

"Oh Merlin." She whispered. She hadn't been to a place like this before. The beautifully varnished floors reflected the guest's image; the walls were a beautiful shade of light maroon with pictures hung all around it. The ceiling was enormous and was painted a very light shade of peach with gold lining.

The waiter came up to them and bowed slightly before asking Draco if they had reservations.

"Yes, under Draco Malfoy." He said and the two were lead to the upper level of the restaurant.

They were lead to a small table near one of the French windows. If you looked you could see the lights start to turn on around the city.

"It's amazing." She whispered and looked at Draco with a smile. His heart skipped a few beats and he grinned at her slowly. They were given the menu and they started to order their meal.

"Order whatever you want." Draco said smoothly looking at his menu. Hermione stayed quiet. She looked over her menu to see the less expensive meals. "What?"

"Oh nothing. Just looking." She flipped the menu to look at anything a little cheaper but found that most were the same price.

She started to look nervous. She couldn't ask Draco to buy her anything from here. It was all too expensive. She looked down at her dress then looked around at the elegant outfits other women wore. She suddenly felt inferior. Something that had become very common for her.

"No granger. Something's up. Don't see anything you'd like on the menu?" He asked. It was a classy up joint. Maybe it was too fancy for her taste buds.

"No nothings wrong." She muttered but subconsciously grabbed at her dress. Draco watched her for a moment and understood as her eyes glanced around the room.

"Hermione." He murmured gently. "Don't worry. You look perfect; choose anything you want on the menu. Don't worry about how much it is alright?"

She nodded slowly and looked at the menu again. The waiter came back and poured them both some water.

"Would you like to order some drinks?"

"Yes, I'd like a bottle of your best red wine, a glass of Chateau Tanunda Brandy and Hermione what do you want?" Draco said smoothly.

"A glass of Chardonnay." She said quietly still browsing the menu but smiling up at the waiter.

"I'll be right back. Then I'll take your order." He left to the bar.

"Draco this is all too much, can you really afford this?" Hermione said still self-conscious.

"Yes it's fine, stop worrying." Draco said looking over his menu one last time.

"It's just I've never really been anywhere so expensive. I mean look at everyone, the way their dressed and look at me." She blurted putting down the menu.

Draco couldn't help laughing. Hermione made the face she'd make when she was upset at Harry or Ron and looked like she was going to protest his sudden outburst of laughter but he raised a finger before she could open her mouth.

"I don't mean to laugh but look around you look perfect, everyone in this room seems to be dull compared to you. You think this place is too expensive I think you deserve it. I look at you and I see an elegant woman who is ten times better than any other woman in this room."

Hermione blushed a bright red and he grabbed her hand. "I mean it, you're beautiful and no I don't mind paying to bring you here."

"I didn't think you thought I was all that." She said quietly but there was a smile on her face. "You never did before."

"I was an idiot back then Hermione. I was listening to what I was told. I never really opened my eyes to see the truth. Now one of my closest friends is half muggle, I was too blind at what I had to realize what I didn't have."

"You seem so different, I look at you and I feel like I'm meeting you for the first time. There is still a lot I can remember from Hogwarts but still it all feels so different now."

"We are different, the both of us. Listen I've grown up. I'm not the snob I used to be, there are still things that are the same but a lot isn't. You're right there and I would like to show you how much is different."

"I would like that a lot." Hermione gently reached over and brushed her fingertips against the back of his hand.

"Are you ready to order sir?" The waiter had returned with their drinks and stood waiting for them to order.

"Yes I think we are." Draco took a quick glance back at his menu. "I'll have the number one lobster."

"Very good sir and you madam?"

"I'll have the number five steak."

"Very well. I will return with your food." With that he left to give the orders. Draco watched Hermione as she sipped her drink and admired the pictures.

He watched as her hands curved around the glass. How her lips touched its rim delicately, her skin looked so soft to him and he wondered what it would be like to feel those hands on his chest, her eyes were still bright like they were in Hogwarts but now they held something else. Something he hadn't noticed the night at the club. They held experience, not magic, life.

She had always been so book wormish, she had always been so concerned about her grades and at the coffee shop she'd said she worked for the ministry, and like him she worked long hours and was technically married to her work but still she'd lived. She'd allowed herself to feel emotions, to feel pain of heartache; love, friendship and she'd seen things. Maybe not a lot but she had.

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't feel when she reached out her hand and touched his fingers. It took him a minute but when he felt the jolt of electricity run through his hand he realized what was going on.

"I want to thank you for tonight, no one's ever done something like this for me like I told you and I don't think I'll forget it too easily." She had a smile on her face, a genuine smile that showed gratitude and something else, could it be? Affection?

"You're welcome, I just hope it's not the last time you'll let me."

"Maybe, you'll just have to wait and see."

###

He was still alone, his mind was full and his stomach was empty so it was hard for him to do much else than pace. He wanted to be in there, it was his right wasn't it? Maybe if he were in there he wouldn't be so uptight, he shook his head and rubbed his temples. NO he would be worse off if he were in there, that's why he wasn't in there.

He would be a nervous wreck and maybe he wouldn't' be much help but still he wished he could be sure everything was all right.

So many things had happened since that fateful night at the club. So many memories to think about till it was time to go in. He just wished he wasn't alone, not physically but in his mind.

###

Two months had gone by but to Draco if felt like an eternity. Not a bad eternity either.

"Draco where are we going?" Hermione asked him as they drove down the countryside.

"I already told you that it's a surprise. I won't tell you till we get there."

"You're terrible." She made her little face, the one that he'd come to adore. Her lips pouted a little and her eyes were half closed, giving her a child like appearance.

"Thank you, I know I am."

"I can't believe you convinced me to skip my weekend schedule."

"Well we both work too much, my boss almost had a heart attack and asked if I was feeling well." Draco smirked as she laughed. "You need to get out of that lab. So I spoke to your boss and he seemed very pleased that you were going away. Actually he seemed to want you gone for a while. Something about you overwork yourself and need a break."

"That's not true. I do my job very well thank you very much." She protested in a defensive manner.

"I'm sure you do, but I'm going to prove to you that you can do this just as well."

"Is that a challenge Mr. Malfoy?"

"Yes I believe it is Miss Granger, up for the challenge?"

"Have I disappointed you so far?" She said with a smirk.

"No."

"Then you're on."

"Good, just what I wanted to hear."

"You better be careful Malfoy, I won't always do what you want."

'And that what I love about you, I have to work to get my way.' His mind whispered.

They drove for another half an hour, watching the scenery change as they drove further away from anyone. It was beautiful. Lakes and trees, meadows and the sweet smells that came from the wild flowers.

They finally reached a spot near a large body of water. It was bright and seemed to breath and welcome them as Draco stopped the car.

Hermione stepped out and seemed to be in awe as she walked on the fresh grass. Draco watched as she touched flowers and inspected the scenery around her. He took everything out of the car and with a flick of his was set a blanket and a picnic basket out on the softest piece of grass.

After spending so much time with her in the last two months he'd come to realize things he probably would have never noticed. Behind her bold and cool exterior laid a delicate crystal that could shatter at any moment and he knew a lot about crystals. They needed special care or their energy would dull and finally die. He had ever intention of keeping this crystal alive and vibrant and the first step was to show her that he wanted her in his life. Not just as his friend but as much more.

Meanwhile Hermione continued to explore around her, it was breathtaking like everything else she seemed to be experiencing lately. All because of him. Her secret devotion, the man she would love even if he tore her heart.

It was the reason Ron had broken up with her. Because he saw even before she realized that she would never belong to anyone else but the Slytherin king.

She'd denied it over and over but now she realized, he was her world. Even if she'd hated it, loathed the thought that her dreams were filled with his face she couldn't help but fall deeper in love with him.

Perhaps she always had loved him. He was her match in every way. He was intelligent, talented, determined and stubborn. Just like she was, he worked for the things he wanted even if he went the wrong way of getting it and no one told him he was wrong and in true these were the things that drove her crazy. Haunted her while she slept in her lonely bed.

He was her fantasy, how many nights had she awakened reaching for the man who in her dreams was the father to her children, her lover and companion? Too many to count that was the answer her heart and her mind repeated.

Her mind raced as they sat down and ate, they talked about idle things that had happened in the week that didn't seem to have any importance but the weather was soothing and it made the atmosphere less tense.

It always seemed tense around them, though neither would ever admit it. They both saw these outing as just friendly get together and nothing more, both too afraid to get hurt and not realizing that they both wanted the same thing.

The day passed and they enjoyed each other's company. Nothing important was said but perhaps for the first time this felt like more than just an innocent date. It felt secluded and romantic. Not that Draco hadn't been romantic on their other dates it was just that it had always been in a very public atmosphere and never truly private.

Late into the afternoon they packed and headed back to the city, Draco apparated this time to save time but his mind was so distracted that they ended up not in Hogsmeade like he'd intended but a block from his apartment.

"Oh damn, I'm sorry." He apologized.

"It's ok, I'd like to see where you live." She said sincerely. It was an honest answer and in her mind she had determined this. If Draco could not be anything more than a friend then he would-be her closest and friends see where the other lives and even though it would break her heart when he'd find someone new and he would tell her everything about her she'd live. Like she always had when her heart was broken.

"Alright, come on." He stopped the car in his private parking spot and they walked up the stairs. He was a little nervous. He'd never had a woman in this apartment. No he was no virgin, in Hogwarts he'd used so many girls for his pleasure and he'd done it with every intention of hurting them. Then when his heart started to ache for the one girl who he knew would never give herself to him he became worse with them. He slept with girls to pretend even for a moment that it was her. How many memory charms had he placed on pansy Parkinson when he'd accidentally called out Hermione's name instead of hers? How many times had she dyed her hair for him when he asked her to without realizing that he wasn't picturing her but a girl who in his eyes was a goddess? No Draco Malfoy was no stranger to sex but he was a stranger to love.

"I will admit it's not much, I um am not that great with décor I suppose." He said as he opened the door. Hermione was left speechless.

If this was what Draco Malfoy though was dull he was very much mistaken. It was beautiful. She had thought his room would be green but it wasn't. There were blues and light shades of cream; the kitten was stainless steel and marble. His couches were a burgundy red that if she knew he'd bought because the color reminded him of her would have made her cry.

His bathroom was a beautiful shade of peach that was contrasted by shades or lilacs and the sweet smell of jasmine.

His room was what impressed her the most. The ceiling was enchanted to fit the sky and the walls were a rich blue with hints of green here and there, not the main color as she had expected.

His furniture was cherry wood and his bedspread was a soft material that was also thick and had the shape of two dragons that actually moved around on the bed peacefully.

"Draco this is amazing." She said as he handed her a glass of water.

"It's what I could o with it, I'll admit it's a bit um bachelor." He said with a smirk.

"It's perfect."

They sat and talked for what seemed hours, for some reason being there made her more at ease. Like maybe this was her home too.

It was midnight and she realized she needed to get home but what happened next was anything but what they expected.

"I should get going, I can apparate from here."

"Yeah, um I'm still sorry, I should have been paying more attention." He said getting up and taking her glass. He seemed disappointed that she wanted to leave.

"Draco?"

"Yes?"

"I had a wonderful time."

"It was my pleasure." As they spoke they got closer, unaware of their movement. He was now at arms length and there was nothing Hermione wanted more than to leap into his arms and embrace him. Their minds must have been working in synchronization because without realizing it Hermione found herself wrapping her arms around Draco pressing her lips harshly against his and he in turn was doing the same.

They couldn't breath, they didn't' care really. Frustration, torment and longing just wouldn't let them part. Too much emotion ran threw them to stop but neither wanted it to go too far at least not yet but to Draco who had so much experience with women felt like this should never end. This was making love, sex that was just a physical pleasure. Kissing the woman you loved and adored was love, he was joining souls with her and his mind knew this was what his life was missing.

"Please, don't let me go." She begged when he loosened his grip.

"Never, god I wanted to tell you from the moment I saw you again, I love you I need you I've missed you so much every moment we're apart and I want you. I want everything about you, I want your heart I want your soul your body your mind everything. I have to have you, I can't live without you."

She relished every word and indulged in them, ecstasy was what she felt. No man had ever touched her but his words felt just as good.

"Draco I love you, now shut up and kiss me damn it."

###

Yay I updated, Hehe. Sorry it's taken so long. You have to understand writers block, husband, no internet and well I'm pregnant. So lots happening. I haven't' abandoned any story but let me get this one out of the way for now Kay.

Luv ya all and thanks for your patience.

Sanura


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